India English: Ten Tips to Communicate Effectively in English

chillibreeze writer —Moona Abdullah

Effective communication is one of the essential tools in life that very few are born with and most of us simply develop them during the course of our years. Be it meeting new people in social events, handling people in our workplace or even maintaining cordial relations with ones own family, a few essential tips to communicate effectively will help ease your way.

1. Simplicity

Use simple language while communicating. Speak to express, not to impress. Using a lot of quotations and wisdom from the literary pundits of yester-years may impress the girl or guy next door, but may not necessarily carry across your message. Avoid using slang while conversing, as people might not be familiar with the terms.

2. Brevity

A friend of mine has a very good eye for detail and when she converses with anyone she invariably dwells on insignificant details. After losing her audience a few times in the middle of conversations, she took the hint and began to ‘crop’ her talk. Needless to say, she’s now quite a hit at most parties.

Women tend to be more detailed in their conversations, while men mostly say too less. Striking a balance between the two takes a bit of practice. You should share enough to understand, but not enough to take a PhD in it unless asked for.

3. Silence

Take a breather between sentences. As much as you like the sound of your own voice, take a few seconds to pause between sentences to let your words sink in and more importantly to collect your own thoughts. It will help you quickly assess if you have strayed from the topic to drier grounds.

4. Slow and Steady

“Seest thou a man that is hasty in his words? There is more hope of a fool than of him."Speaking slowly is one of the simplest ways to be heard. Speaking slowly helps us to not check ourselves against hastily spoken words, but also to assess the situation and emotionally calm ourselves down before saying something we may regret.

5. Questions

Asking questions, contrary to popular belief, is one of the smart ways to communicate well. By asking questions, you not only make sure that the person you are speaking to is in the same line of thought as you are, but is also a non-intimidating subtle opening to correct any wrong ideas that you may have given out.

6. Listen and Hear

Listening and hearing are really two different things. Listen to people when they talk and express their views. By listening, one means listening without interrupting. Everyone can hear what others are saying, but listening entails paying attention and understanding what the other person is saying rather than just hearing the sound of their voice. Do not tune out if you disagree. Try to keep an open mind while listening. There is no easier way of communicating effectively than to hear the other person out.

7. Angry John and Indifferent Susan- Communicating with ‘Difficult’ people

We all have our ‘off’ days. Keeping this in mind, try to be open to the possibility that not all words spoken by the other person might be a result of pure logical thinking. Our emotions can play havoc with our thought process. Try to handle people with a little understanding while speaking- this will help you communicate effectively. Any one going through a distressing break up or job loss will be prone to a different thought pattern. The sooner you learn to be sensitive to this, the easier it will be to speak to them appropriately.

8. Respect

Communication means exchanging ideas and for two or more people to exchange ideas, it’s imperative that you respect the boundaries of the other person. You may not agree with a person’s viewpoint, and they may not agree with yours and this is where effective communication really kicks in. When you respect the person’s views as their own individual idea, then you can part with them in cordial disagreement. Simple phrases like “I don’t really agree with that, but everyone’s entitled to their own opinion" or the more candid "Let’s just agree to disagree on this" will help you go a long way in maintaining effective communication.

9. Miss Manners

There is nothing more irritating than being rudely interrupted while speaking. Treat people with the same courtesy that you would like others to bestow upon you. Nothing commands respect better than manners. Do not interrupt while others are speaking. Give them the time to express their ideas.

10. Body Language and Tone

This is quite an overlooked factor while communicating with people. Maintain eye contact while talking as this promotes confidence and trust. A smile is the easiest and most effective ice breaker and communicator. Your posture and your level of confidence while addressing people play a very important role in effective expression. Though be warned, there is a difference between healthy confidence and a pompous know-it-all attitude.

Many a time people miss what we are saying because of the way we say it. Any sentence, idea shared or even question asked demands the appropriate tone. How many times have you found yourself asking someone else "Were you asking me something or stating something?”. This could actually arise from two simple reasons- either we are simply ignorant of the appropriate tone to express our thoughts or we are actually imposing our views on others rather than giving them the freedom to form opinions on their own.

Above all, remember that everyone invariably has an inner calling or rather a cry to express one self. Communication really begins when you can put into words the inner cry of your primate self and carry it across to the soul of another.

It’s not really about talking successfully; real communication is talking to others successfully.

Out of 5 “chilies”, our editorial team gave this article...

—About our writer:

Moona says, "After spending hours coding there is nothing more unwinding for me than having a little
tête-à-tête with words on paper. I love meeting new people and being exposed to different cultures: not to forget their mouth-smacking cuisines (Food being a major weakness of mine...) and also spending a few hours of the day with my nose buried under a book or clanging away on some musical instrument. I have a Masters in Information Technology and am currently residing in Trichur, Kerala .I worked for Kott Software (an outsourcing company in Cochin) as a programmer and am currently taking a short break from work to spend some time with my family."

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