The alarming rate at which the number of child abuse cases is growing has caused concern among parents. There was a time when mothers used to start worrying about their daughters the day the girls would attain maturity and thought that their sons were always safe. But these days the possibility of threats to kids is right there from their very birth and it cuts across gender differences. We hear and read about the molestation of months-old infants. We are contemptuous and dumbfounded every time we learn about such cases. We are horrified when we think of our own kids and their safety. Here are the things we can do to avoid any form of abuse that our children are open to.
Don’t Trust Anyone: In most cases of child abuse the culprit is not an outsider. We have heard of servants taking revenge on children; psychic fathers raping their daughters; uncles and grandfathers satisfying their hunger; siblings and cousins experimenting out of curiosity. The list is not the ultimate one. Hence, you should never think that your child is in safe hands in spite of all your faith in humanity. Always remember to leave one per cent to chance and circumstances. Apart from protecting your child against the obvious perpetrators, keep the insiders in close scrutiny even if they are brothers or uncles, sisters or aunties. The first time you notice anything abnormal or unusual, take a serious note of it, find out the causes and go for the cure immediately. The best way to shield your child against any kind of damage is to identify a feasible threat the earliest possible.
Research the Places you Send Your Child to: Today, we have more both-parents-working homes than not. Parents are forced to leave their children with someone else. Some children go to their friends’ house for studies, parties, watching movies, playing games in which case it is the responsibility of the parents to know enough about those friends as well as the location and the ambience of their homes. Before visiting those places themselves, parents should better not send their children. Even if it is a public place parents can still have a long look at it, evaluate the possibility of any sort of risk and then send their children. Of late, even temples and shrines have been in the news for negative reasons. Then why should we spare the park, the play ground or the swimming pool?
Spend Quality Time with Your Child: Children, by nature, are homely and attached to their parents. They love to see them around. They feel a sense of security unconsciously when parents are there with them. Going out with parents, visiting fares, seeing places, enjoying new dishes – these are some of the unforgettable moments for the children, which have a long-lasting impression on their minds. Let them understand family ties and learn to celebrate happy moments spent with family members. If only parents can make enough time to do things for their kids, there is very little for which they will look beyond their parents. The idea is not to restrict a child’s world to its parents, but to expand the world of parents a little further into that of the child. In many homes, parents and children meet each other hardly once a day. Statistics show that these children are more subject to abuse than those who get enough of parental company.
Listen and Speak to Your Child: These days, children are unstoppable when it comes to extra-curricular activities. They indulge in a host of such activities as swimming, playing cricket, solving puzzles, working on self-initiated projects, etc. etc. As parents, we would certainly like to see them excel in every field but certainly not at the cost of their safety. Children do require some amount of space and independence to bring out their talent and creativity. But make sure that they regularly communicate to you the activities they indulge in, and communicate preferably, in detail. It might be difficult to listen to someone else’s story at the end of the day when you are trying to recollect yours even if it is that of your own child. But if you can listen to their bed time stories instead of telling them one, it will help you keep track of how, where, with whom and doing what your kid is busy. You have to think hundred times before rebuking them or discouraging them against anything they enjoy doing. But sometimes, when it is necessary to do so, find the right way of doing it. This kind of communication between parents and children is actually a product of consistent efforts of parents in this direction right since the birth of a kid. Kids are naturally frank with their parents until parents make mistakes. Disinterestedness, speech interruptions, threats, abuses are some of the mistakes parents make for which children start withdrawing.
Educate Your Child: There are things which children learn instinctively and things which need to be taught. Hand-holding, all the time, is not the ideal way of making children learn things. Instead of teaching, educate the child. If you want two kids to learn the same thing, even then they might have two different ways of learning it. First, let your child learn things naturally. When it fails to do so, you are always there to help. Keep a lot of good reading material at home. Let the child always have the sight of a tidy room and then teach him/her how he/she can contribute towards cleanliness. In most cases the sense of cleanliness in a child actually enables the child to distinguish between a “good” and a “bad” touch. Let the child feel the satisfaction of a job well done. It will add to the child’s self esteem. Teach the child how to handle and make best use of criticism also how to treat failure. Help the children take their own decisions so that in your absence they don’t find themselves indecisive and therefore helpless. It does not mean that the child would start behaving like an adult from a very early age but that there would be enough maturity in the child to handle unforeseen situations. Invent games through which the child will develop sharpness and alertness. Sex education, after all, is training in behavioural patterns. So when are you going to start educating your child and thereby protecting against all odds?
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