Indian Talent, Global Content
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Indian Talent, Global Content |
Expat Childbirth: A Grandmother Tells Her Version of Bonnie's Birth, in Bangalore, India
March 7 through April 1, 1999, Bangalore, India, by Sylvia Perkins
The large box containing the big Baby jogger, the "Baby Showers" gift from friends at home, was stuffed with as many disposable diapers as Jane and I could cram into it. This feat was done at the LAX airport as soon as the luggage was weighed, allowing for just a few more pounds. Filling the list that Joanna had sent from food, office and baby items had met the luggage requirement limit and left almost no room for my personal clothes.
They're the first to rent the clean spacious home with a living room, kitchen, 2 bathrooms for the 2 bedrooms (one soon to become the new home-office) Floors are white ceramic tiles throughout and if it were not for plastic screens that prohibit the flow of air, it might even be cross-ventilated (afternoons reach 93 degrees inside the house). Each room has a large ceiling fan and some are installed in bedroom windows as well. The kitchen has a two-burner gas cooker and toaster oven and lacks hot water but 1 am learning to do without such conveniences. The walled in garden is nicely planted, bougainvilla climbing up on the masonry walls, banana trees and lots of vegetables providing daily fresh salads of tomatoes, several kinds of lettuce, herbs and more to come. Besides weeding and watering Ralph chases "bandicoots" (giant rats) and snakes out. He has made excellent use of the many packages of seeds sent by mail from family members. I now have the opportunity to know some of their other needs that we can supply. The flat roof is nice for hanging out the laundry which is done with the new scrub board brought from Mexico. Comparisons were made for washing clothes, especially "nappies" (diapers): this way or with an automatic washer which would be not only expensive, small and inefficient but the water supply and drainage may not be adequate. So we made sure the diapers would be soaked in hot water before washing and bought large plastic tubs for rinsing 3 times! On Monday, my second day here, I accompanied Joanna to the Bangalore Baptist Hospital where she was seen by Dr. Pretti who suggested that they might induce labor by next Monday if nothing changes. The baby's heart rate was monitored and an appointment was made for Thursday. Joanna was seen on Thursday by Dr. Thankum who said because she was almost 36 years old and considered to be a high risk and because the baby was late, she should check into the hospital tonight and begin with inducing labor tomorrow. I stayed home while Ralph took her in by taxi but joined her the next morning for what was going to be the next six days. They began with jells to cause her to dilate and later pills for inducing. She was quite discouraged on Saturday morning when still nothing had changed-until that afternoon. She was taken into the one private labor room when contractions started and Ralph and I were both allowed to be with her. What a sight it was to see her individual doctors and later all four female obstetricians together march into the room, all wearing their beautiful sarees, lots of bangles on their arms, rings on their toes in barefoot sandals, spots on their foreheads, and long black hair, some adorned with fresh flowers. Of course, we were very concerned with Joanna's proper breathing, relaxing and everything else that the book, The Gift of Motherhood, called for the support person to do but when one of the doctors noticed the book, they all became interested and asked me about it - all but dear Ralph who did not abandon her! Joanna's perspective of that scenario was a bit different... she remembers a room full of nurses and four doctors talking about the book, their children, and chatting continuously like typical women. When I saw Dr. Susan put on that big rubber apron (over her sari), I thought this is it! Still Joanna did not dilate and during contractions, the heart rate would slow down indicating distress and that the cord may be wrapped around the baby's neck, they told us. Finally at 9:15pm, Joanna was taken to surgery and a caesarean section was performed. That room, alas, was being remodeled so when she was wheeled in, the painters stopped their work to watch Joanna had been instructed not to push and continue to control her contractions through deep breathing. She recalled feeling as if her head was in a paint bucket inhaling toxic paint fumes as the doctors searched for instruments that the painters had moved. Ralph managed to snap a few quick pictures so we know that the doctors did have their ubiquitous tea while Joanna was being prepped in another room.
We were told to wait outside that room, where we would worry and pray. Ralph decided and I agreed that he run over to fetch Dr. Naylor from her apartment nearby. She had just arrived that morning from the U.S. and had been asleep for one hour. Ralph was assured that Dr. Susan was quite capable and surely into the surgery by now so he returned without her. Just minutes later (while he was still calling people to pray) at 9:35pm, Saturday, March 13,1999, the precious baby girl, weighing 8.25 lbs and 20" long was brought out to our room. Wonderful! Joanna was also doing well. Thank God!
Wonder what Ralph would have done had he been alone now he was just laughing so happily. The new father from next door ran in and lifted Ralph as high-their way of congratulation. I was delighted to be there! Joanna was then brought in and their little family was complete.
Click to read the entire Grandmother Perspective.
Chillibreeze's disclaimer: The views and opinions expressed in this article are those of the author(s) and do not reflect the views of Chillibreeze as a company. Chillibreeze has a strict anti-plagiarism policy. Please contact us to report any copyright issues related to this article.
Sylvia Perkins lives part of the year in Ajijic, Mexico with her husband Hal and enjoys writing about the local culture and the wonderful people there.
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When I arrived on March 7, 1999 the day before Joanna's baby-due-date, we were happy that no indication of the birth had yet occurred so that I could recover from jet lag and so that we could get the house in order like hemming curtains for three rooms; getting familiar with the household for cooking, ordering food to be delivered from the store, filtering water, using the mosquito netting for sleeping, harvesting vegetables, unpacking and sorting the baby clothes and assembling the bed that Jane had given her. Getting to know the new young maid Rajeswari continues but that is another story.
These first few moments in the room were so emotional! First, the nurses simply left the baby there with Ralph and me, still covered with blood and stuff as babies are not bathed at night! Also, she breathed with such a rattle that I called for help and the pediatrician came to "wash" out her stomach which he repeated twice again later. That was the last time she spit up and doesn't even slobber to this date.
We're all happy to be back home now although Joanna has headaches and is uncomfortable from the surgery but time will heal. We all worry sometimes about our baby crying too much or not enough, sleeping too much or not enough. We take lots of pictures--something Ralph said he would never do. I remember his saying, "Jane is always taking pictures of her kids, like they’re movie stars or something". We entertain visitors and show off our beautiful baby. Still hoping to find the perfect name…We've even had visitors from India who now live in the U.S. and who I met when they were students at USL almost 10 years ago. 
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